One Precious Life...

Friday, March 28, 2008

Regrets...

This was something i kept thinking about last thursday. recently, many people chose to leave God, leave the church because of various reasons. well, all i feel for them is regrets. Now everything might seem like they wanted, seem like it's the best, However, i know that at the very end when we ALL meet Jesus for judgement day. Bible states it's a day where there'll be "gnashing of teeth"...this symbolises the deep regrets when we could only bite our teeth real hard and"arghhhhhh...IF ONLY..." i know that on judgement day, they will regret....

People did things which i felt the 'regretin' for them. things which i hope i could help them turn it around for them. but but but but...i've learnt this important lesson-----> i can't!hahaha there are too many things beyond my very control. i can only remember that God is Soverign. He is still in control! Amen and Amen to that! I will give my best to interceed for these people and TRUST e Lord fully!

moving on...WHEE!! countdown 7 days! i've got exactly 1 last week left!! hahaha everything's more or less prepared! Thank God for a loving and caring mummy (: she initiated to help me get vacum pillows,bedsheets,shampoo,conditioner,body wash,contact lens tablets,cleanser and solution! whoa..a big burden lifted up after gettin all my essentials =)

things left to do:
1. Make copies of all my documents
2. Give copies of my passport,visa and e-tix to Mr Kumar this monday
3. Pack my Stuff!!

yep yep, things are falling in place. somehow i'm wishing this week will pass me quickly. Get-it-over-and-done with. i'm kinda taking it as easy as possible,but there are people around me like my dad's making it tougher for me =S hahaha trying to physco myself that 6months is short! whoahahaha. Spiritually, i'm preparing myself le!

something i've been reminding myself:
1. Reverence towards God. He's all knowing, all powerful and all present
2. Discipline. i gotta decide to pray,to read the WOG,to go to church.
3. Giving my undivided devotion to God when i'm there!

you know i wanna GROW there, i don't wanna crash there! yep yep...so pls pls pray for me yeah?hahaha
okie question christine--"what would you miss most in Singapore?"
Christine replies "People, my family and my church"

West 1st Anniversary's tml! exciting man, "Lord pls make it a success" Amen and Amen!!

2:08 PM ♥

Friday, March 14, 2008

Countdown...22 more days left

todays' about complaining all that i'm going through cos of going to the states

i just went to school with random today to collect our DS-2019 forms, her Anne had the last 'E' cut off. poor her has to go through so many other stuffs.
this whole getting-into-US thinggy is very complicating, 1000 forms to fill, loads to pay...i've paid about $150 bucks so far, much more to come. here's the list of things i still have to do to get myself into the states:
1.Pay my $2404 air tickets tml
2.Do my $196.50 cashier's order at the bank-to apply for US visa so i can work n stay there
3. US$100 SEVIS Fees using credit card, poor me doesn't have one-still haven't got any idea what that SEVIS is...
4.Getting Random to scan my CNCC (a 'i'm free from criminal record' letter from the police cantonment) and get it to Mr Kumar...
5.Go for my visa application at the US embassy next thurs
6.Get ready US$2000 to pay University of Central Florida (UCF)

and the list goes on and on and on....
i also got my flight itenary today!...Terminal 3.7:15am.4th Apr...
7 hours to tokyo
9 hours to San Fransico
5 hours to Orlando
total? 21 hours...plus all the transit time taken, more than 24 hours...
exciting? tiring?..both...

the stressing part about this whole thing is...i've gotta handle it all on my own. my greatest fear is the payment part, cos loads need to be paid through credit cards n internet bankings which i've got ZERO idea on. apparently, my parents don't know too. well, i guess not many understand and get to know all this crap i've got to go through...

worrying that there'll be mistakes in my forms, late payment etc etc etc. US is kinda strict and security is kindda tight there since there's loads of stuffs going on there.

other than all these paper work crap. there's alot alot alot going inside of me...
emotionally & mentally: it is HARD GOING... the thought of leaving my family, my friends, my sheeps, dmm, shepherd, my church, my home... the thoughts of being--alone physically.
these few nights are sooo....ahhh i don't know how to describe the 'missing' part.
so yep, pls cherish all u have here. i've learnt that part. this is worst than transferin to a new group..
i really am leaving EVERYTHING behind me...bringing along only myself and God and Random...
solution to this? God, only he can fill that hole in my heart emotionally...
so hahaha Don't tell me u miss me...don't make it sound sad. it'll make me miss everything even more..haha

Spiritually: i've gotta be a leech; stick ultra close to God. if not, i really can't imagine being suck into work, into fun, into the 'life' i'm living. spiritually, i've got loads to overcome there man. i'm praying for a good church there!! "oh God..."
the solution to it? DISCIPLINE. i've gotta watch n listen to sermons, read books, skype very very often!!!.

it's drawin so close up to my face. it's reality check! everything sounds exciting in the begining-Disney, States, Shopping, Fun...BUT...it isn't quite fun now. hehehe....
after all my heartfelt words, i think only 2 can understand all these--1. God 2.Random...don't know who can fully grasp these mixed feelings...

so what's keeping me on this whole thing? the fact that i will grow soooooo much more after this. this experience i can never have anymore. this is a mini experience of church planting. hahaha man, there's more to worry abt church planting man!!!

okie not being emo!...just being real,but no worries cos i'll be walking through this entire thing WITH GOD...i'll soar above all these issues, i'll make sure i shine at work in Disney, i'll make sure i stand above victoriously! i don't wanna cry every night i'm there, don't wanna be defeated! hahaha i wanna overcome this entire thing with my Lord...

Christine will take time to settle all these within her but she'll jia you, jia you & jia you!!!! lookin forward to Easter finding 40 and our West Anniversary...

2:48 AM ♥